This blog clarifies the distinctions between shame and guilt and highlights how each can be approached for personal growth. Shame and guilt are often used interchangeably, but these two emotions are fundamentally different in how they shape our self-perception, relationships, and personal growth. In personal development, the goal is to transform shame into self-compassion and recognize guilt as a guide for behavioral change. Shame keeps us trapped in a fixed mindset, while gu

The 'blamer' characteristic is challenging because it is so ingrained and second nature that shows up everywhere from private thoughts to public remarks. The good news is it can be softened and reprogrammed. When used in humor it can be extremely funny; however, most of the time it’s not and usually dampens the mood with co-workers, family, and friends. It is de-energizing to spend time around someone with a negative mindset, a 'blamer'. Once a person recognizes they have a n

In last week’s blog, The Cost of Harboring Resentment , we explored the roots of resentment and outlined steps to overcome this debilitating emotion. Resentment not only hinders our ability to lead effectively in business but also prevents us from forming rich, meaningful relationships that bring energy and purpose to our lives. Why We Call It the "Cancer Emotion" Resentment can have a cancerous effect on relationships, especially with family and spouses, slowly eating away a

I often tell my clients how resentment undermines healthy relationships—both with others and with ourselves. I refer to it as the "cancer emotion" because if left to fester, it can silently grow, eroding our well-being. Resentment prevents us from truly connecting with others and building meaningful relationships. It also drains energy. Imagine letting go of your deepest resentments, freeing up that energy to foster rich, rewarding relationships instead. The Roots Resentment

Grief—something we often avoid at all costs. Whether it's the loss of a loved one, a relationship, a career, or a divorce, grief is widely viewed as an unpleasant experience. Like many, I once believed grief was a "one and done" process: to feel deeply sad, and then be free of it. The reality is grief stays with us for life. It’s Always There Grief can sit dormant for years before being triggered by a memory or event, resurfacing unexpectedly. In my coaching practice, I encou

Freedom is the opposite of feeling trapped or controlled. Any number of events, such as circumstances or relationships, can cause us to feel trapped. Freedom is the sense that we always have a choice and are in control of our choices. There are a couple of ways to consider freedom: as a legal right, and the other as our perspective on a situation. Any of the above examples can create stress in our life, and we may react to them in several ways: fatigue, digging our heels in,

In the prior two blogs we discussed establishing your mindset and the 5 Elements of Productivity as ways to overcome procrastination. Have you ever picked up a self-help book, filled with excitement and motivation, only to find yourself slipping back into old habits a few weeks later? You’re not alone. Many of us have experienced this frustrating cycle, attributing it to a lack of focus, discipline, or self-belief. But what if there’s something deeper at play? Uncovering Un

Last week, I discussed how establishing your mindset enhances the effectiveness of the five steps used to overcome procrastination. These steps can be described as proactive productivity , a mindset and approach that involves taking initiative, staying organized, and completing tasks consistently. Procrastination often involves delaying tasks or decisions that need attention, leading to stress, missed deadlines, and lost momentum. Stress and avoidance can drain our morale, l

This is the first in a 3-Part series on ways to surmount procrastination. Part 2 will expand on the 5 Steps. Part 3 covers when getting in the mindset doesn’t work. Many productivity books and blogs highlight five key steps to overcoming procrastination: planning and prioritization, self-discipline, time management, taking initiative, and consistent action. However, the point of this article is not just to reiterate these steps, but to emphasize the mindset that makes them

It is easy to label ourselves but how many go a step further to understand that label? Take this quiz to garner valuable insights into why you are perpetually late or to better understand why others are late. The keys revealed here may surprise you. Read more on lateness in my prior blog. This quiz is designed to help you identify the underlying reasons behind chronic lateness. By understanding your specific challenges, you can take steps to address them and improve your pun

Let’s look at the reasons people are perpetually late to events and appointments. Understanding these underlying reasons for chronic lateness can help in addressing the behavior more effectively, whether through personal strategies or professional support. Take the lateness quiz Chronic lateness can become a deeply ingrained habit. If a person has been late over a long period, it can be challenging to break this pattern without deliberate effort and potentially an interventio

Most self-help and New Age spiritualism books often emphasize the importance of being present. Have you tried this? In my experience, it is extraordinarily difficult to achieve. I spent a week surveying conversations I had with people—over 20 in total—and more than 95% of these discussions fell into two categories: the past and the future. Being present was hard to find. I decided to let go of trying to be present throughout the entire day because it only led to frustration.

by David Stamation, Executive Life Coach Of all the tricks, tools, and coaching tips, it is the act of intention setting that stands alone in getting results. Want to find love? Desire to move up a level in your career? Want to reignite that spark in an important relationship? Want to get closer to your children? Want to feel better at the end of each day? Or do you want to reclaim a long-lost hobby? Set an intention. When you set an intention, it puts you on a glide path tow

I’ve written extensively on procrastination, drawing from my experience with coaching clients and exploring ways to mitigate the desire to put off tasks using tools and techniques, coupled with deeper individual insights. However, I’ve never addressed “precrastination.” Precrastination is the opposite of procrastination. It involves completing tasks as soon as possible to avoid thinking about them, often before they need to be completed. While some people enjoy a healthy bala

In 2008, I decided to give away all my possessions and sell my San Francisco loft, keeping only a few boxes of personal belongings and prized books. I bought a 23-year-old Toyota Land Cruiser and quit my high-paying job in Silicon Valley. What was I doing? I was tired of wearing a corporate mask that never fit too well and wanted a more visceral life experience, believing I’d find it exploring Latin America. The intellectual side of letting go of this life was freeing and hop

In my years of coaching, I’ve learned that clients consistently seek to optimize or enhance aspects of their lives. Health and fitness emerge as frequent topics across all age groups. Many express a desire to feel healthy and fit but struggle to achieve it. Typically, their goals can be categorized into three segments: Health: This includes eating right, ensuring adequate sleep, and achieving weight loss. Fitness: This involves engaging in physical activities such as exerci

I once had a problem with anger until I used personal development to get a handle on it. I stopped scaring people and started feeling more peaceful inside. Diving into this misunderstood emotion, I spent years studying how it keeps us from having what we want in life, and I saw great results. Here is my condensed study on anger. I hope it helps you decide to make a change or softens how you see yourself and the triggers for your anger. If someone close to you is struggling wi

The tendency to have a short fuse is apparent both at work and at home. In professional settings, individuals often maintain a facade of calm focus, concealing any inner turmoil they may be experiencing. Some executives tightly control their emotions due to the perceived risk of displaying anger. However, emotions simmer beneath the surface, potentially leading to greater challenges if not addressed. The Client My client shared that while he maintains professionalism at the o

Last week, I received several texts from clients regarding the Delegation blog published the week before. Some offered personal insights, while others prodded me to delve deeper. In response, I crafted this quiz to help you better understand your relationship with delegating work tasks to others. Use this quiz to deepen your self-knowledge and learn about your leadership style and abilities. For the original article click here: Delegation . Quiz: What's Your Delegation Styl

Despite its importance, many individuals, particularly executives, find delegation challenging due to recurring issues of trust and control. Take the Delegation Quiz . When exploring why executives struggle to delegate to their fullest, a common refrain I hear is, "To do it right, I have to do it myself," or "I don’t have time to explain it, so I’ll do it." These explanations, however, are what I refer to as "bypasses"—they serve as rationalizations to justify maintaining the