Why They Get Under Your Skin David Stamation, Endo Executive Coach The thing I keep circling back to in coaching sessions with endodontists is the difficult patient. The source of the difficulty is they're not actually the person you're reacting to. The fidgeter, the talker, the scared one, the one who questions your competence, none of them are causing the size of the reaction you're having. They're triggering it. The reaction itself belongs to someone else, usually someone

David Stamation, Executive Life Coach Most of us were taught as children that anger isn't okay. It wasn't permitted, it wasn't encouraged, and it certainly wasn't explored. So, we learned to stuff it. And when we couldn't stuff it anymore, it came out sideways: explosive, sharp, scaring or hurting the people around us in ways we never intended. There is an alternative: advanced anger work. At its core, it means slowing down and using anger as information rather than treating

David Stamation, Executive Life Coach Here's something I keep running into with clients: the quality that makes the biggest difference in other people's lives is usually the one they can't see in themselves. Not because it's hidden. Because it's too close. It's the thing they do so naturally, so automatically, that it doesn't register as a skill at all. It just feels like being themselves. So they never think to name it, let alone claim it. I call it a superpower. And almost

David Stamation, Executive Life Coach Rest sounds simple. Stop working, do nothing, recover. But for most of us it isn't simple at all. Some people rest and come back genuinely restored. Some people rest and spend the whole time feeling like they should be doing something else. And some people don't really rest at all, they just run until something makes them stop. Read more on the cost of moving too fast in my prior post, The Art of Patience. This quiz is designed to help yo

David Stamation, Executive Life Coach This quiz accompanies the blog titled: DRAMA - It's Not in the Job Description Article Summary: Delve into the origins of workplace drama and understand its implications, spanning from its detrimental effect on employee retention to the demoralization of non-drama inclined staff. Learn how coaching equips leaders and managers to drive cultural transformation, specifically when tackling and eradicating workplace drama. Gain insights into t

David Stamation, Executive Life Coach Meditation is concentrating the mind with a mundane task, so the rest of the mind can find peace. -J.J. Connolly This is an ever-present topic with coaching clients, most of whom are seeking an entry point to experiment with it. It's an ancient practice with a lot of modern interpretations. I'll cover five types here to give you some structure for getting started. I'm a fan of the "survey" method: sample several types of meditation, note

The Power of Cultivating Patience in an Impatient World David Stamation, Executive Life Coach Have we lost the capacity to be patient? Netflix isn't loading. Where's the Amazon same-day delivery? How come we haven't been seated or served yet? Things have sped up and become increasingly efficient, to the delight of most of us, and it has rewired our nervous systems toward speed and near-instant gratification, at the cost of patience. We've seen it in ourselves and our children

David Stamation, Executive Life Coach Last week you may have taken the quiz to identify your childhood strategy, a fancy way of describing how you, as a kid, went about getting the love and attention you needed from your parents. Haven't taken it yet? You can Take the Quiz before reading on, so you have your own strategy in mind as you read. This week, as promised, I'm decoding one with a real example: mine. While these strategies are impressive in how they develop and how

David Stamation, Executive Life Coach Identifying your childhood strategy is an exciting starting point in your personal development journey. It identifies a key aspect of your personality that was formed early in life, principally developed by a child to ensure he or she receives both love and attention from their parents. It is incredibly effective during childhood. Where we get into trouble is when we keep the same strategy into our adult years, and something that worked a

David Stamation, Executive Life Coach Most meetings go sideways before anyone speaks a word, not because the agenda is weak, but because no one decided what "good" actually feels like when it's over. Here's a simple shift that changes that: pairing your meeting's outcome with a specific emotional intention. When intentions are tied to emotion, and when you're emotionally invested in a goal, you're significantly more likely to achieve it. The idea is to complement the agenda a

David Stamation, Executive Life Coach Your Endo Quiz Results, Decoded Last week I put a quiz in front of you, Running the practice...or is it running you? Nine questions on culture, retention, hard conversations, and whether you've got someone to think out loud with. If you took it, you already have a rough read on where you land. Mostly A's: You're Leading, Not Just Managing. You're not in crisis, you're in maintenance. The work here isn't rescue, it's sharpening: tighten

David Stamation, Executive Life Coach This isn't another systems audit. It's about the human side of leading: your culture, retention, how the hard conversations go, and having someone to bounce your vision off of. Take 2 minutes. There are no wrong answers, only insight. Want more info? Read up on our Endo Executive Coaching program. How would you rate the current culture of your practice? A) Energized, loyal, and values-aligned B) Decent, but there's friction or quiet res

David Stamation, Executive Life Coach Most people carry guilt like a stone on their chest. Learning to tell them apart is one of the most liberating things we can do. In coaching, guilt comes up frequently with clients seeking to feel more peaceful inside and more comfortable in their own skin and relationships. One of the first things we explore together are the two types of guilt. It comes as a relief when they begin operating with this distinction. Most arrive believing th

David Stamation, Executive Life Coach The fastest path to change is the one that feels the slowest. I'm slower now. Partly age, partly wisdom. When I want real change in my personal development, the approach has to be counter-intuitive: go slower. Most people, myself included, respond to wanting more by adding more. More activities, more commitments, more drive. It doesn't work. I've seen it fail in my own life and in the lives of every client I've worked with. Think about th

It is easy to label ourselves but how many go a step further to understand that label? Take this quiz to garner valuable insights into why you are perpetually late or to better understand why others are late. The keys revealed here may surprise you. Read more on lateness in my prior blog. This quiz is designed to help you identify the underlying reasons behind chronic lateness. By understanding your specific challenges, you can take steps to address them and improve your punc

David Stamation, Executive Life Coach Procrastination isn't a character flaw. It's a signal worth exploring. Summer has a way of making certain things more visible. The longer days, the slower pace, a rare exhale after a packed spring. And sometimes, sitting quietly in that space, the list appears. Not the work tasks. The other list. The one that hasn't moved in months. I know this one personally. I've written about procrastination before and I'll say again what I've come t

David Stamation, Executive Life Coach Naming your overwhelm is the first step toward making it smaller. When I say I'm overwhelmed, it tends to be broad and non-specific, as if a big wave has knocked me down and I'm simply eager to find dry shoreline, rest, and catch my breath. Survival mode. It's an unpleasant and tense place to be, in both mind and body. I've done my own work on overwhelm through coaching. But it was at a weeklong retreat that I witnessed several men de

David Stamation, Executive Life Coach Most of us have either given it or been on the receiving end of it. Silence. Tension precedes it, and it culminates in the silent treatment. I was good at this. I could deploy the silence, the iciness, the emotional withdrawal to make a point I couldn't make with words. I could list all the ways I help clients work through it, but why not stick to my own experience and pull back the curtain? It's a vicious thing to do to another person, a

David Stamation, Executive Life Coach This question gained serious traction with the male participants at our recent annual Love Retreat. I asked it simply: are you a man of your word? You'd think the answer would come easily. It doesn't. I'm not talking about honoring your work commitments, showing up on time, or paying your employees every two weeks. Not insurance premiums or car payments. Those all share one thing in common: structure. When structure is present, keeping yo

David Stamation, Executive Life Coach The Home You Grew Up In Taught You Something. Is It Still Working? There are always moments of joy in my work with coaching clients. Then there are the nuggets. When a client declares an insight that cuts right through. His came mid-session: "Me being reactive is part of the problem." It landed hard in the way something true does. We had been exploring the turmoil at his dental practice. Yes, the employees are a factor. Insurance is a