by David Stamation, Executive Life Coach Of all the tricks, tools, and coaching tips, it is the act of intention setting that stands alone in getting results. Want to find love? Desire to move up a level in your career? Want to reignite that spark in an important relationship? Want to get closer to your children? Want to feel better at the end of each day? Or do you want to reclaim a long-lost hobby? Set an intention. When you set an intention, it puts you on a glide path tow

I’ve written extensively on procrastination, drawing from my experience with coaching clients and exploring ways to mitigate the desire to put off tasks using tools and techniques, coupled with deeper individual insights. However, I’ve never addressed “precrastination.” Precrastination is the opposite of procrastination. It involves completing tasks as soon as possible to avoid thinking about them, often before they need to be completed. While some people enjoy a healthy bala

In 2008, I decided to give away all my possessions and sell my San Francisco loft, keeping only a few boxes of personal belongings and prized books. I bought a 23-year-old Toyota Land Cruiser and quit my high-paying job in Silicon Valley. What was I doing? I was tired of wearing a corporate mask that never fit too well and wanted a more visceral life experience, believing I’d find it exploring Latin America. The intellectual side of letting go of this life was freeing and hop

I once had a problem with anger until I used personal development to get a handle on it. I stopped scaring people and started feeling more peaceful inside. Diving into this misunderstood emotion, I spent years studying how it keeps us from having what we want in life, and I saw great results. Here is my condensed study on anger. I hope it helps you decide to make a change or softens how you see yourself and the triggers for your anger. If someone close to you is struggling wi

The tendency to have a short fuse is apparent both at work and at home. In professional settings, individuals often maintain a facade of calm focus, concealing any inner turmoil they may be experiencing. Some executives tightly control their emotions due to the perceived risk of displaying anger. However, emotions simmer beneath the surface, potentially leading to greater challenges if not addressed. The Client My client shared that while he maintains professionalism at the o

Last week, I received several texts from clients regarding the Delegation blog published the week before. Some offered personal insights, while others prodded me to delve deeper. In response, I crafted this quiz to help you better understand your relationship with delegating work tasks to others. Use this quiz to deepen your self-knowledge and learn about your leadership style and abilities. For the original article click here: Delegation .   Quiz: What's Your Delegation Styl

Despite its importance, many individuals, particularly executives, find delegation challenging due to recurring issues of trust and control. Take the Delegation Quiz . When exploring why executives struggle to delegate to their fullest, a common refrain I hear is, "To do it right, I have to do it myself," or "I don’t have time to explain it, so I’ll do it." These explanations, however, are what I refer to as "bypasses"—they serve as rationalizations to justify maintaining the

The stigma surrounding Executive Life Coaching often boils down to a single notion: the belief that there's something inherently wrong with us. It's a sentiment I've observed time and again, whether in our Inner Legacy group seminars, my Men's Group discussions, or my private coaching sessions. Early on in these programs, almost every participant experiences a moment of realization, often accompanied by a sense of physical relief, as they come to the understanding: I'm not th

A client of mine was developing a 5-Year Plan and sought my assistance. I devised weekly questions and writing exercises tailored to her profile. These exercises spanned 5-6 weeks, aiming to identify crucial aspects in her plan. However, her planning momentum slowed midway through the process. Upon revisiting the endeavor, we delved into the reasons behind her pause. To pinpoint the underlying issue, I posed three questions. Are you hesitant to commit due to fear of failure?

This week I’ve been reflecting on happiness. Jim, a friend of mine and one of the wise elders in my community, recently shared this quote and series of questions with me. I’d like you to reflect on them, too. I have the pleasure of sitting with him in my local Men’s Group; a body of men committed to group personal growth. Contemplating the Pope's Wisdom with Jim In 2017, the Pope was asked about his secret to happiness. He responded, “Slow down. Take time off. Live and let li

At Legacy, we practice what we preach, aligning our actions with the Executive Life Coaching principles we teach our clients. As a requirement, each team member works with a coach and attends personal development seminars annually. Here's how I lead by example, walking alongside my clients on their journey. I never ask them to do anything I haven't tackled myself, whether it's summoning bravery or mastering the art of saying "no." Our approach establishes trust and authentici

What do you do when the tools you've tried to manage overwhelm don't seem to work, and you feel like you're constantly being defeated by it? Despite your efforts to regain control, overwhelm continues to dominate, leaving you feeling powerless to change the situation. In last week's blog , we covered common tools including this quiz  used to tackle overwhelm. Tools recap: breaking down tasks, prioritization, time management, setting boundaries, and addressing negative thinkin

Overwhelm is a common challenge addressed in coaching sessions, as individuals often find themselves burdened with too many tasks and not enough time to accomplish them. Many times, simply introducing a new tool or concept can empower individuals to regain control and break free from overwhelm. Take the Quiz While overwhelm in short bursts can be energizing or motivating, persistent overwhelm can lead to a cascade of problems. Prolonged stress negatively impacts physical heal

Confidence vs Self-Esteem Years ago, someone inquired about the noticeable increase in my confidence. The answer was straightforward: I employed personal development to gain a deeper understanding of myself, discovering what I truly wanted. But there's more to this story; let's delve beneath the surface. While understanding my desires played a role in boosting my confidence, its roots extended elsewhere: to self-esteem. I used personal development to navigate and enhance my s

Last week we covered the reasons why we say YES when we want to say NO, some examples include: it's an obligation, feeling we don’t have a choice, and a desire to be liked. The cost of living this way, saying YES, has downsides: being overbooked, late to meetings, late on deliverables, anxiety, and resentment. Trust We say YES to create value for ourselves, but when we can’t follow through it has the opposite effect and it damages relationships and erodes trust. People don’t

For some people the act of saying NO comes easy. For others it is a terribly uncomfortable position that creates such a conundrum, they end up saying YES when they want to say NO. Do you find yourself saying YES when you want to say NO? Did you say YES to: A request for a raise? An ill-timed vacation request? Or say YES to dining at a Chinese restaurant when you wanted Italian? An activity with the in-laws? The examples are endless, so why do we do it? Why We Do It It’s no ri

Friendship dynamics evolve significantly from childhood to adulthood. In our school years, friendships seemed to effortlessly form through shared activities on the playground, after school bike rides, or getting into mischief together. It felt almost magical, easy, and effortless, and we didn't fully comprehend how it happened. As adults, particularly men, the quest for that seemingly elusive magic to forge new friendships can be perplexing. Research and anecdotal evidence fr

Letting go. Sounds simple, right? We've seen it on yoga t-shirts or heard a friend say it, "Let go. Surrender." Here's my current perspective on this phenomenon: it's about control and the art of relinquishing it, or at least some of it. Simply saying, "Let go," isn't enough, so let's apply the control test. I'm a fan of simplifying complex ideas into two buckets. Let's break down control. Bucket 1 consists of what you can  control, while Bucket 2 holds what you can’t control

The first time someone said, David, you’re doing the work. I smiled like I knew what they meant, as my mind raced to sort it out. What did it mean, doing the work? Recently, my client Jim shared his initial confusion upon hearing this phrase years ago when he embarked on his coaching journey. Given Jim's disciplined and hardworking nature, being told, "Hey, you're doing the work," initially seemed like a statement of the obvious, something he believed he was already familiar

My Story Remembering to celebrate my accomplishments, big or small, has been my ongoing challenge. It wasn't until my coach and wife consistently nudged me that I realized the transformative power of acknowledging my successes. In my family growing up, celebrations were scarce; achievements were met with a brief acknowledgment and a directive to keep going. Through coaching, I unraveled two reasons behind my reluctance to celebrate. Firstly, I placed immense importance on my