Who Are You Without the Practice?

David Stamation, Executive Life Coach

A Retiring Doctor’s Worldview

PART ONE OF THREE: WHO ARE YOU NOW?

Over the next three posts, I’m going to walk through the three questions I hear most from retiring endodontists. Not the financial ones. The ones that arrive quietly, usually six months in, when the novelty of freedom wears off and something more complicated takes its place.

This first post is about identity. The second is about marriage. The third is about what comes next. They build on each other, but each one stands on its own

Start here.

I work primarily with dental specialists, many of them endodontists, and I see this moment often.

The practice winds down. The mission is complete. Wealth built. Families raised. A business run for 30 to 40 years. And then the quiet question arrives:

Who am I without the practice?

For decades your calendar, your identity, your purpose was structured for you. Now that structure is gone. You may have 20 or more healthy years ahead. What will you do with them?

The fast answer I hear:

“Nothing.”

No schedule. Golf anytime. Travel. Tennis club. Grandkids. Drive the sports car more often. A place in Florida. A drink in the afternoon sun.

I usually respond:

“Great. And then what? Six months from now?”

Six months is about how long it takes to decompress. To unwind from decades of pressure. To let the nervous system settle. Then the real questions surface.

What do I actually want? What did I shelve for thirty years? Who am I outside the operatory?

A man or woman needs a mission. If you don’t consciously choose one, drift will choose for you. Here’s the part many don’t consider: your spouse is watching. No stated intention creates tension. Not because they want to control you, but because lack of direction has a weight. It presses down on everything around it.

Retirement without intention doesn’t feel like freedom. It feels like fog.

Boredom Isn’t What You Think

Boredom isn’t having nothing to do. It’s something far more uncomfortable:

• Low stimulation

• Low meaning

• Blocked engagement

• Energy with nowhere to go

It’s agitated stillness. That agitation often turns into irritability, tension, even anger. Not exactly the retirement you spent thirty years earning.

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Two Tracks in Retirement

Track One: The Chosen Life.

You become a student of yourself. You explore. You experiment. You use retirement as a luxury laboratory for self-discovery. Over time, a direction emerges. A new North Star. Your spouse relaxes. There’s movement.

Track Two: The Slow Drift.

You numb the restlessness. More alcohol. Too much TV. More distraction. Constant busywork to justify, “I’m doing something.” Anything to avoid the quiet. The spouse grows tense. Concerned. Unsure what’s happening.

Both tracks start in the same place. Only one leads to clarity.

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Truth Be Told

Once you see the tracks, you can choose consciously. This is where coaching enters.

We don’t hand you a purpose. We excavate it. Through structured curiosity. Through questions nobody else is asking you. Through the passions you packed away when the practice needed everything you had.

Retirement isn’t the end of a mission. It’s the beginning of a chosen one. You’ve spent decades being excellent at something. That capacity doesn’t retire.

It redirects.

The question is whether you’ll drift into what comes next or choose it. Come curious. The next chapter is already forming. Book your private exploration call with David. Read other endo-focused posts here. Explore our Endo Executive Coaching program here.

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This is Part One of a three-part series.

Part Two: “What Your Retirement Is Doing to Your Marriage”

Part Three: “The Second Career Nobody Warned You About”